19 SERIOUS FOLKS WHO USED TO BE INCELS NECKBEARDS OR NICE GUYSNICE GIRLS WHAT HELPED YOU SNAP OUT OF IT AND HOW COULD PEOPLE HELP FRIENDS OR COLLEAGUES WHO MAY BE ON OR GOING DOWN THAT ROAD

1. was…

It's a bit weird, but in my late teens (I'm 30 now) I started playing female characters in MMOs, firstly just as a joke but as time went on and I started making friends it became more and more difficult to tell people the truth. I soon found myself on the receiving end of the exact same attention and behaviours I was exhibiting myself in the presence of girls. It was like looking in a mirror for the first time. Every word and action seemed to be meticulously thought out as if to be as inoffensive as possible while subtly trying to passive-aggressively build a relationship as if I didn't see right through them. I wondered if it might be as obvious for actual women. I've never been the confrontational type so I tried to let them all down as gently as possible, an approach that proved completely ineffective. I was worried that if I told them the truth it would destroy them, and I didn't want to be nasty either. Continuously I found myself getting backed into corners like that. I honestly had no idea that's what I was doing.

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