When I was 20 my parents and younger brother had gone away for the weekend so I invited my girlfriend over to our house for a night of passion. I had this great idea of dragging a mattress onto the roof so we could make love under the stars. I dragged the mattress through a second floor window and up a sloping section of the roof. The roof was corrugated metal with bolts sticking out in the corrugations every metre or so. As I finally got the mattress on the top of the roof I started slipping down the sloping roof in bare feet. I slipped about 6 or 7 metres and stopped at the gutter on the first floor, but I had also slipped over the bolts which had ripped open the soles of my feet and blood was pissing out of my feet all over the roof. My girlfriend, who was watching me, saw the blood and went and got a few towels and I wrapped up my feet. I then climbed off the roof and she drove me to the closest hospital to have my feet sewn up. Having anaesthetic injections into the soles of my feet remains the most painful experience of my life…we went home with my feet sewn and wrapped up and still had sex. I told my Mum what happened the next day as the mattress was still on the roof and the blood was still there. We never spoke of it again. I’m 48 now and haven’t thought about that for a long time.
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